Tuesday, September 9, 2008

The Shifting of the Light

After a long, torturous summer of glaring light and searing heat, this morning I awoke to soft gray skies and a cool ocean breeze. My first waking thought was 'Ahhhhhh.....'
Not many people suffer from Summer S.A.D., and it seems that most of the world is made up of Summer People. You know the ones--they thrive in the heat like lizards, fantasize about the summer all year long, and every vacation involves a beach. I wish I could join the club, but my idea of hell is being stuck in the unrelenting sun all year long. I still can't believe that I was born and raised in California. For me, the sun is like a radio right next to my ear, loudest during the summer months, and annoying as hell. I just.want.someone.to.turn.it.OFF.
So it is finally, blessedly, September, and although it is not yet technically Autumn, I sense a change in the atmosphere. The air has finally cooled, and the angle of the sun is a tad less aggressive. I can finally breathe, and concentrate, and lift my head to the sky and not fear being blinded. The summer doldrums are finally lifting, and my thoughts turn to apple cider, pumpkin patches, and winter crafts.

Saturday, September 6, 2008

May 18 1946 - September 5 2006

Participated yesterday in the Susan B. Komen Walk for the Cure to cheer on Sarah, who is walking the entire 3 days for my mom. It happened to fall on the two year anniversary of my mom's passing, and needless to say, it was a very emotional day for me. I think I went through all seven steps of grief and back again in one day, and came home and slept for twelve hours, only waking up to hold my son.

My mom was not the type of person to put herself out there and talk about her experience, so I'm doing it for her. She would never say so, but she was the most selfless, warm, unconditionally loving person that I've ever known. Her heart went out to everyone, she trusted that the world was a good place, and she prayed constantly for others, even when she should have been praying for herself. She suffered through chemo, lost her sense of smell and taste, was poked and prodded every week for five years and never complained. She never reprimanded anyone, even when they deserved it.
For the woman at my graduation ceremony who gave my bald mom dirty looks as she got sick on the grass--F___ you. For the doctors who 'forgot' to call back with her recurrent diagnosis--F____ you TWICE. For the mean woman who told my mom that she probably wouldn't be sick had she just meditated more (!?!)--F___ you THREE TIMES. My mom would never dream of saying these things, so her firebrand daughter will do it for her.

I guess I'm not quite past the anger stage.

Thursday, September 4, 2008

Advice? I'm the queen of advice!

I recently discovered the beauty of eHow. I write articles, I get points, I join a community of other writers. Interesting. I've been so beat down by this mind-numbing heat that I need something--anything--that will keep me up and at 'em. So there is my little contribution to the world of e-articles. My own little journalistic endeavor, thrown against the death rays of the sun. And I'm actually getting paid for it!